Is Technology Ruining Your Relationship and Sex Life?
In a world dominated by smartphones, social media, and 24/7 connectivity, many of us are so focused on our screens that we’re neglecting the person right in front of us. While technology is designed to bring people together, it can also create distance in our most intimate relationships.
How Technology is Impacting Your Relationship
Think about your morning routine—do you wake up and kiss your partner, or do you reach for your phone first? Many of us use our phones as alarm clocks, making them the first thing we interact with each day. Before we know it, we’re checking emails, scrolling through social media, and catching up on the news—leaving little room for intimacy or meaningful connection.
This pattern continues throughout the day, especially in the bedroom. Experts advise that our beds should be for sleep and sex only, yet more and more of us are inviting screens into our most intimate spaces. The result? A decline in emotional and physical closeness with our partners.
The Bedroom Screen Dilemma
The presence of technology in the bedroom can have a direct impact on your sex life. One study in Italy found that couples with a TV in the bedroom have sex half as often as those without. For couples over 50, the decrease is even more significant—a 60% drop in intimacy.
And it’s not just TV. Many of us bring our phones, tablets, and laptops to bed, choosing to text, browse, or work instead of connecting with our partners. Studies show that one in four people send texts before falling asleep, and over a third of us use laptops in bed. The more time we spend with our screens, the less time we spend engaging in real intimacy.
Is Technology Replacing Your Partner?
Phones and gadgets are always available, responsive, and easy to engage with, which makes them dangerously addictive. Unlike our partners, they never challenge us, are always at our fingertips, and offer instant gratification. But if you find yourself preferring screen time over spending time with your partner, it may be time to reassess your relationship priorities.
How to Reconnect and Restore Intimacy
If technology is coming between you and your partner, here are some simple yet effective ways to reclaim your relationship:
1. Establish a ‘No Gadgets After 10 PM’ Rule
Turn off your devices in the evening and focus on your partner instead. Spend time talking, touching, and reconnecting without distractions.
2. Be Present in the Moment
At mealtimes, during conversations, and especially in bed, put your phone away. Eye contact, meaningful conversation, and physical touch are key to maintaining intimacy.
3. Communicate Your Needs
If technology is becoming a problem, talk about it. Express your concerns and set expectations together. A healthy relationship thrives on communication and mutual understanding.
4. Create Screen-Free Activities
Find hobbies and activities you can do together that don’t involve a screen—such as cooking, exercising, or playing a board game. Shared experiences build deeper connections.
5. Set Boundaries with Work and Social Media
If work emails or social media are interfering with your personal life, create limits. Turn off notifications in the evening and set clear boundaries around screen time.
Don’t Let Technology Replace True Connection
If you feel like your partner is more engaged with their phone than with you, don’t ignore it. Address the issue, set healthy boundaries, and prioritise real-life intimacy. And if you’re struggling to reconnect, seeking professional guidance can help you navigate these challenges.
Need Relationship Support? Let’s Talk.
If technology is affecting your relationship and sex life, sex and relationship therapy can help. Book a free consultation today to discuss how to restore intimacy and build a stronger connection with your partner.
