You may think that having a drink can make you feel sexier or improve your desire for sex, but the effect alcohol has on sexual function is a damn sight more complicated than that. And some of what you’ve been led to believe, isn’t quite as true as you thought…
Alcohol makes us more attracted to a partner.
You’ve heard of drinking goggles? When you’re drinking, everyone seems better looking. Hence the term, beer goggles. The alcohol we drink lowers sexual inhibitions to the point that little or no discretion is used when approaching or choosing romantic or sexual partners.
Alcohol turns us off
Yes, alcohol can help you to chill out, shed some of your inhibitions. However, too much alcohol can act as a depressant. It makes you tired, but more than that, it can leave you unresponsive to your partner’s touch.
Alcohol lowers our inhibitions.
Alcohol gives you that liquid courage. After a few drinks, we can feel invincible. That’s because in low doses, alcohol can ease anxiety. The problems start when we have one too many glasses and suddenly, we’re not in control. The alcohol is.
Alcohol isn’t arousing
After a few drinks, we may think we want to have sex but the alcohol we’ve consumed will interfere with the way our body gets aroused. Normally, when we become aroused blood automatically flows to our genitals. They start to swell and self-lubricate. When we drink, the excess alcohol actually decreases the genital response and physical arousal. It interferes with lubrication, which can lead to painful sex or discomfort from the friction of penetration.
Alcohol gives off mixed messages
When women drink their central nervous system triggers an increased heart rate and warmer skin. People can take that as a sign of attraction or arousal, but it is just the alcohol’s chemical effect on the body.
Alcohol impacts our orgasm
Most alcoholic women can struggle to orgasm and two thirds report they can’t. Too much alcohol leads to a reduction in blood flow to the vagina, resulting in less intense orgasms and more stimulation needed to reach orgasm.
Too much puts us at risk
Let me say at the start: victims are not to blame. If you are assaulted, the responsibility lies entirely with the perpetrator, regardless of what you have or haven’t drunk. It is important though, that we know the risks. Sometimes a perpetrator will deliberately encourage us to drink so that we become incapable of saying no to their advances. If we are drunk, we are not able to consent to any form of sex. Risky sex can also lead to unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.
It’s a problem if we can’t remember
Not remembering or feeling good about what happened the next morning is potentially dangerous, but also embarrassing. It can leave us with feelings of shame and awkwardness. We don’t know what we said or how we behaved, not to mention what we did or didn’t do sexually. When you’ve drunk so much you’ve forgotten, you don’t know how to interact with the people around you. You can feel horrible about yourself and find it hard not to beat yourself up.
If alcohol is getting in the way of your sex life, log onto my website and grab my free guide to repairing your relationship.